Gratitude

Life lately has been a little crazy for me. It hasn't been anything earth shattering but really hard for me to juggle. I feel like I have been running out of steam and it frustrates me. I have always looked up to the women around me. I have such amazing examples of womanhood. I always felt like the women around me were perfect. They never struggled, they never doubted, they never had a bad day, they had perfect marriages and never disagreed with anyone, they had perfect hair, and had a perfect schedule, and everything always went according to plan, and they simply were perfect. I couldn't ever figure out what was wrong with me because I had bad days, and things don't always work as planned and sometimes I felt like I couldn't walk any farther. I had one of these days on Sunday and I was supposed to teach nursery. I wasn't sure if I would be able to deal with nursery and I needed more spiritual uplifting than what nursery could offer me and my amazing sister stepped in and allowed me to go to Relief Society. I was so grateful to her and I am grateful for the example that she has given me over the last year and all of my life in fact. I am grateful for the strength that she has. I am grateful for a mother who has shown me so much love over the years and is now one of my best friends. I don't know what I would do without her and I never want to find out. I love that I can call and talk to her about anything at anytime and how supportive she is of me. I am grateful for all the other women and the examples that have been set for me.

I have started blog stocking people's blogs and am so grateful for the opportunity to be part of these women's lives. I read about their joys and their struggles and it makes me admire them that much more. I read as they post their testimonies or things about Christ and the gospel. I grow so much closer to these women that I don't know if I would have the chance to any other way. I learn from them that these struggles are a way of growing, (which I knew but those reminders never hurt!) and that growth is a good thing. That on those days that I struggle I need to look at it from the what-can-I-learn-from-this point of view. I usually can have a glass half full approach but there are those days where it feels like the glass is completely empty and when that happens it is nice to have those reminders.

Most of these women I had contact with when I was younger and the relationship was not compatible to hearing about the trials and struggles that they had. I mean you usually don't tell your 13-year-old babysitter that your week has been really tough! And now, I look forward to each time they post and an opportunity to know them better. I grow knowing that it is okay to have a bad day or it is okay to not have all of the answers. It is okay to feel like you are walking through a dark tunnel, as long as I have the faith that there will be a light at the end and I just have to hold my Savior's hand and he will guide me. I know that this will pass and that I am being taught lessons now that will be used in days to come. I know that I don't go through any of my trials alone.

I realized today that as I get older and become a "big kid" (as I am not quite to the adult stage) that one day people could look up to me and I wondered what type of example I would be setting. Would I be that amazing woman in Relief Society that, though isn't perfect, has a testimony and knows her Father in Heaven loves her, that there is a plan and she must have faith? Would I be someone to look up to? I realize that most of you don't ever know that girls like me are watching or what we see, but I wanted to tell the women in my life that I am so grateful for you. I am grateful for the example that you have given me. I am grateful for the strength that you each possess and the love that you have. I am grateful for the support that you have shown me over the years and how quickly you have all come to my aid in times of need. I am grateful for the love that you have for your children and other children and allowing me to part of their lives. There are so many things that I could thank you for but the tears in my eyes, thinking of how special you all are to me, are making it hard to see.

I will end by a quote that I read while at a YSA fireside on Sunday and it was exactly what I needed to hear that day and so maybe it will something that someone else needs to hear today. This was a fireside given by Sister Dalton and she talked about not always needing all of the answers and I loved that thought!


"I feel to invite women everywhere to rise to the great potential with you. I do not ask that you reach beyond your capacity. I hope you will not nag yourself with thoughts of failure. I hope you will not set goals far beyond your capacity to achieve. I hope you will simply do what you can do in the best way you know. If you do so, you will witness miracles come to pass."
- Gordon B. Hinckley

This post might be a little random and out of the blue from the typical pita-making entries but I have really struggled with life lately as it has been super stressful and I took a moment to read through blog posts today and I read ones that were the exact thing that I needed to hear. And after knowing that those were an answer to my silent prayers, I was filled with this overwhelming gratitude to those women in my life. Each of you have such a great impact on my life and I am so grateful for you. Thank you for being a part of my life.